Dig Deep and Uncover The Pain

Michael Hamburger Scottsdale, AZGreat day my friends.  I recently had an experience that I think all of us involved in marketing and sales can learn from, myself included. I recently had the privilege of attending a phenomenal MLM company’s award trip for their top 200+ distributors.  I was there as an invited guest of the owners as an industry consultant.  While on this amazing trip, I had the opportunity to connect with a large number of their reps.  These are top notch, amazing people.  Among these superstars, I met one of their reps and we really got along nicely. I vividly recall many wonderful conversations and a budding friendship growing from this mutual experience.  What I am going to share next is not meant to embarrass anyone.  Rather, I believe their is a valuable lesson for all of us to learn or refresh ourselves with.  I’m certain this has been me in the past at some point over my selling career.


A few weeks later, this gentleman followed up with me to invite me to join his team. He wrote, “Well I would be stupid if I did not at least throw this out at you. I need to sponsor you (or your wife) and let you be Company XYZ’s top distributor since we both agree this is such a great company and business opportunity!! LOL”.

I was extremely polite and responded, “Thanks for the invite. We both really like Company XYZ, however I will not be joining your team.”

His reply really got me thinking, “I guess I missed out again. I really wanted you on my team…

He needed me and wanted me? Did he ever bother to find out what I needed or wanted?  No. Not once.  His statements left me feeling like I was a prize that could be of value to him vs. what his offering or opportunity could do for me and my basic needs/wants.

Rather than focusing on me and my desires, the recruitment conversation was all about what I could do for him. There is nothing wrong with that if you sit on a thrown. If you are in sales or you lead people, then you’ll surely go broke or have to wait to get “lucky” (this is the result of dedication and working your tail off non-stop to achieve the object of your desires and manifestation – different topic altogether for another time).  How could we begin a business relationship when it was all about him?  In direct sales, we are taught that the path to success is to uncover your prospect’s pain.

Michael Hamburger - SteakI remember one of my early MLM mentors sharing this basic principle with me, “Never make your prospect feel like your next meal ticket.”  I’ve got kids and that means we watch more kid movies than I care to ever admit.  If you’ve ever seen the movie “Madagascar” you may remember the part where Alex the lion is hungry and when he looks at his best friend the Zebra, he sees steak instead of his friend.  We tend to put this type of energy off to our prospects when we focus on how they can fill our needs or fill our pipeline.

I think the important lesson in this entire experience is that we really need to find out the driving factor for our prospect. We must remember to make the experience all about them and solving their pain. By doing so, we will increase our sales and percentages but we will also grow our team’s and our bottom line. Plus, we won’t leave people around us feeling weird or used.

Dale Carnegie wrote a fabulous book called, “How to Win Friends and Influence People” that I believe everyone involved in the selling profession deserves to read.  He stated that if you make your conversations about the person you are speaking with rather than about you, people will like you and you will gain influence.  Think that is important?  When is the last time you bought something from someone you didn’t like?  Now, I am not talking about speaking with someone over the phone for a utility, cable, etc.  I’m talking about something of significance.  Did you like the person you bought your home or car from?  You may not be BFF’s but the odds are stacked in the favor that you at least liked them in the moment.  We humans tend to do business with people we know, like and trust.  Want people to like and trust you?  Ask them questions about themselves.  People love talking about themselves and they will walk away from your conversation most likely liking you and your time together.

To dial this into what we do for a living, Find out what they desire and uncover their pain in one of the core 4 areas of their life: time, money, freedom and/or control!  Find out THEIR MOTIVATION not yours.  You already know your motivation or you should…  Your prospects will want to know that you have a direction and you are on purpose.  Save the “all about me” time for later.  

Discover who your prospect is.  Discover what drives them?  Discover the “pain” in the life: time, money, freedom and control.


This week I challenge you to ask your prospects probing questions.  Dig Deep.  Uncover your prospect’s PAIN.  Remember, most people’s greatest challenge or pain revolves around time, money, freedom and control.  As a direct sales/MLM business owner your opportunity can be their solution.

Michael Hamburger - Maya Angelou quote

By asking questions and discovering your prospects motivation, you will gain a vast amount of perspective of what your prospect wants but you will also be able to assist them in achieving what is important to your prospect.  By doing this, you will more easily accomplish your desired outcome.  Zig Ziglar always said that if you can help enough people get    what it is they want, then you’ll naturally take care of getting what you want.  This is huge.  Maya Angelou said that, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”  I feel that by leading with these core concepts, you’ll not only gain customers but you’ll also gain loyal friends that want to buy from you and hang out with you!

Happy days my friends.  Have fun asking questions and discovering the amazing people that you can assist forever change their lives through your opportunity.  And remember SW4…  Some will, some won’t, so what, somebody’s waiting. Until next time my friends…


Michael Hamburger

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